To what do you attribute your love of writing?

In large part, I'm sure it's connected to my love of reading, and I have my Mom to thank for that. She fueled my love of books from the time I was a toddler, and I think the two go hand in hand. Books fed my imagination, my vocabulary, and my ability to see an issue from different viewpoints.

What is one of your favorite parts of writing?

In the case of 'Joan On Her Own', it was having the opportunity to recreate my Mom's personality and give it voice again. After reading the manuscript entirely through, my brother Craig told me he could literally hear my Mom's voice saying some of the things I wrote, so I knew I had succeeded. In general, I like being able to craft something visually with my words that a reader is able to see in their mind, or provide a new type of clarity to a situation many of us might experience.

What made you start writing at 59?

Retirement, and a story that was begging to be told. Those last three years of my Mom's life were three of the hardest in my own, but also three of the best. I grew so much during that time, especially in my relationship with her, and it was important to share the idea that we can continue to grow relationally until we draw our last breath. Plus, given some of the things that went on in our family, I knew it would resonate with others who've had similar experiences.

Was there any standard you had for yourself 'going in'?

There was only one, and it was to write strictly what I knew. No embellishing, no leading my reader. I wanted to be completely honest in my portrayal of everyone. In spite of some of the choices that my brothers Rob and Donny made, I still love them deeply, and it was important to me to portray their actions as objectively as I could at the time. You can completely disagree with someone, and still care tremendously about them. I had kept a detailed journal during that period of my life, because it helped me process so much of what was happening, and that was a big help with dates, events, and feelings when I started writing. Craig helped with things I was fuzzy on, and provided me with a lot of memories that came from his perspective.

What was one of the most challenging parts about writing this book?

Honestly, determining how much extraneous 'life detail' to include. I feel like maybe I provided TOO much, but I wanted the reader to feel the rest of my life going on around me even as we were dealing with Mom's decline...sort of the 'peaks and valleys'. Doing that also allowed me to develop other characters who were important in the story. Maybe I shouldn't have included the part about painting my kitchen and dining room, but I did, because it's something that made me really happy during that time.

What do you most want your readers to take away from this book?

A sense of hope. Hope, because we do the best we can with what we have, and it's always far more than we give ourselves credit for it being. You're never alone in a situation, and there's always someone in the wings waiting to lift you up. I also hope my readers can laugh at some of the mundane things that made me laugh. I think more than anything, I want it to encourage people to love well, even when it may be difficult. Love is the most powerful way we have of caring for one another.

You reference your faith in God frequently throughout the book. Do you feel like this might be a turn-off to non-believers or someone of a different faith?

I sure hope not. For me, that faith filled me up and gave me strength to keep moving forward. It also helped me to continue to give Donny and Rob the benefit of the doubt, and kept me from becoming really bitter. Faith in God, or in a higher power or being, is a very personal thing, and I wouldn't push it on anyone. That said, I'd love for the strength I experienced through faith to lead others to explore it.

You ended this book on a cliff-hanger. Can you give us any idea of what's to follow?

Sure. The sequel is titled 'Where I Am Going'. I based it on part of the verse from John 14:4...'you know the way to the place where I am going'. The book chronicles the final chapter of Mom's life, with all its attendant changes and challenges. The focus is much more intensely on our relationship, and the depth of love even as you're letting go. I actually think it's stronger than 'Joan On Her Own' in some ways,..the stage of characters has already been set, and in some respects, just by the sheer nature of the subject matter, it goes a little deeper.

What are your favorite things to do when you're not writing?

If it's early in the morning, I love sitting out on my deck with coffee, and reading for a couple of hours, just like I referenced in the book. I'm also an avid walker, and love to hike and garden. Basically, if it's outside, I'm all in.

What is your favorite date night?

I love going out to dinner at a nice restaurant with my husband, when it’s just the two of us. We never run out of things to talk about, and it’s so relaxing just to discuss things in a depth we might not at home with other distractions. So there’s that, and then another fav would be building a bonfire in our fire pit, and spending the evening outside parked around it. There’s something about watching the sunset around a campfire that is incredibly beautiful, and it quiets my spirit. I know it gives my husband a chance to chill, and that makes me happy, too.

What was the part of parenting you enjoyed the most?

So, so many things...really anything that involved nurturing. I loved teaching my girls, whatever it was, exposing them to new words, new ideas, and I talked constantly to them. I read and sang to them a lot, especially before bed at night. Another big thing was going to the library, and we went a lot. Sometimes I’d pull both of them in our wagon, and we’d have a picnic lunch on the grounds surrounding the library after we checked out our books.

I never minded doing homework with them, either, but they owned that themselves pretty early on. Being outside with them was another favorite things...when they were fairly young, like early elementary/preschool years, we’d always go for long walks on Sunday afternoons, and I remember our neighborhood being so quiet. It was always just the three of us out, and the girls would run ahead, or ride their bikes or roller skate. A couple of times I put on my old ball bearing roller skates from childhood and skated, too, which was glorious. Those were special afternoons.

What was the hardest part of parenting?

Probably navigating high school, and the constant challenge of deciding what boundaries were appropriate, yet trying to give Callie and Kerry enough independence to become self-reliant. We all have to learn from our mistakes, and I wanted both of them to be able to trust their own judgment in preparation for college. They didn’t always LIKE me in high school, and I definitely was NOT a ‘cool mom’...still, our relationships have stood the test of time. My daughters are my two closest friends in the world at this point in my life.

What are some of your favorite childhood memories?

Our holidays, hands down. My Mom and Dad put so much thought and creativity into them, and they were magical. I loved coming home from school to our house when it was decorated for Christmas. My parents valued family so much, and my grandma and our extended family, aunts, uncles, and cousins, were always a big part of our holiday traditions.

I also have incredible memories of our summer family vacations. It was so important to my parents that we see our country and know as much as we could about it. When I was in the 6th grade, we went out west to visit my Mom’s family in Salt Lake City and Idaho, stopping in the Bad Lands and at Mount Rushmore on the way out, and visiting the Grand Canyon, and Bryce and Yellowstone National Parks. Imagine doing that entire trip in a Chevrolet station wagon with four kids! Of course, this was before seat belts were the law, and the far back seat, which was put down, was the much coveted spot to be. That trip is etched in my memory to this day.

Who are some of the people who have influenced you most strongly in your life?

Other than my parents, I’d say my grandmother. She was my Mom’s mother, and we called her ‘Gram’. We were total kindred spirits, and I idolized her. She was so sweet, but also very independent and intelligent, and I could tell her anything. She always listened; always remembered, and never judged...she gave me a lot of room to just be myself. Once I started driving, I used to go over to her apartment and hang out with her, to talk and spend time together. She had the best laugh, too, and she was a lot of fun to be around. All of my friends loved her. She died when I was 27, when Callie was eight months old, and it makes me sad that Callie and Kerry never knew her.

Another huge influence was my childhood minister, who was close friends with my parents. Our families grew up together, and he was one of the kindest, most loving people in the world. Not only that, but he was ‘cool’. My brothers loved him, too. His sermons were so good, and I listened intently to them, even as a younger kid, because I liked him so much. He made me realize that you didn’t have to ‘hit people over the head’ with your brand of belief in God...that your beliefs could look very attractive and bear its own personal stamp of authenticity, based on who you were. That was powerful for me.

What historical event would you say has had the biggest impact on you over the course of your life?

A: In terms of that feeling of the world suddenly having changed forever, I’d have to say JFK’s assassination. I was six at the time, three months into first grade, but I remember it felt like somehow the world had slipped on its axis that Thursday. Even at six, I knew something had changed forever in our country, even though I was too young to verbalize that at the time. I remember my teacher coming back to our classroom after being called to the office to be told, and she was crying. She explained to us, in a very appropriate way, given our age, what had happened, and we were all completely silent-no one knew what to say, and nobody dared ask any questions. I couldn’t wait to get home and be with my mom, because I wanted her to explain things in more detail, which she did. Even riding home on the bus that day, nobody talked. Our family watched next to no TV, but for the following three days I remember feeling like our TV was NEVER off. I distinctly remember watching the funeral service with my Mom.

Even though I never watched ‘Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood’ as a child, (my girls did) my son-in-law recently sent me the YouTube clip of the program he ran the day of JFK’s death, and it made me cry. It brought back that feeling of being six again; confused and not really grasping what had happened; just that every adult I knew was horribly sad and upset. Fred Roger’s concern for the children of our nation at that point in time was so evident, and you could feel it powerfully in the words he spoke that day.